its the little things...

just as there are a million ways to say "i love you" with out saying it, (like putting the toilet seat down, or picking up cherry limeades for the family on the way home), so too are there a million ways to say "Go to Hell!"

here are some of my favorites (or i guess i should say most recent)
1. don't let the dog out in the morning, even though you are the first to wake up, and she will cry and wake everyone else up.
2. stop taking out the trash, both out of the house, and out to the street. let it pile up and smell.
3. when asked if you can start dinner while i am in the shower, don't. then sit and read the paper while the kids go hungry.
4. if a show i like is on, don't even bother changing it, even though i say "oh! look! (insert name here) is on.
5. if i get sick, and tell you i am sick, don't care. let me wash the dishes and clean up the house anyway. then go to bed early, and leave me with a screaming baby.
5. make me do the banking and housing paperwork even though A.) both housing office and bank are on your way to and from work, B.) both housing, and banking are IN YOUR NAME and C.) i only have a car every once in a while.
6. although there was a short period of time without me or kids (three weeks) don't bother getting new tires for the car (even if we have needed them since november and that is what i wanted for christmas) or getting the car to the dealer for a tune up (even though the check engine light has been on for A YEAR!). it will be much better if you wait til i come home, and then have me deal with all this crap (with the two kids!) on my own.
7. when i bring to light the fact that all this shit is going on, and i just want to hang out for a bit, don't even bother looking at me, pull out your iPhone, and start going to your emails.

the thing i don't get, is if you want me to go to hell so bad, why do you want to get in my pants? or is that my final send off? "i know you are sleepy babe, and you have done a metric ton of shit today, and even though the last episode of ER is on, waddaya say?"

my answer with out a doubt is "go to hell."


one more thing i found... put the laundry (YOUR UNIFORMS!!) that i washed last night, back in the dirty clothes hamper. i mean isn't that easier than folding them and putting them away. just have me wash them again, until i can dry them, fold them and put them away for you. JEEZ!!! i can't believe how lazy i am!